The Science of Happiness

Happiness can sometimes feel like chasing the sun. One moment, everything feels warm and bright; the next, clouds roll in, and it’s hard to find that same light again. But happiness doesn’t have to be a fleeting emotion or something that only some people experience. It’s a skill that can be learnt and nurtured.

The science of happiness tells us that while some factors are beyond our control, much of it comes down to the small choices we make every day. Positive psychology research reveals that happiness is not purely a matter of genetics or circumstance, it’s largely shaped by what we do.   That means we have more power than we might think to create a life full of positivity.

Happiness Is Partly in Our Hands

Think about your happiest moments — those times when you felt deeply content. Were they shaped by a major life event, like a promotion or a holiday? Or were they the result of something smaller, like a heartfelt conversation or a quiet moment in nature?

Fascinating research shows that only about 10% of our happiness comes from circumstances like wealth or status. Half of it is down to our genetic predisposition, but the remaining 40% is up to us.  It is about our habits, actions, and mindset.

This means that while we can’t change everything about our lives, we have room to shape how we experience the world. This idea is backed by neuroplasticity, which explains that our brains can adapt and rewire based on what we focus on. By making small, intentional changes, we can train our minds to be more positive.

Starting Small: Gratitude and Kindness

A great place to begin is with gratitude. It might sound simple, or even a cliché, but expressing thanks for the good things in life is proven to boost happiness.  As I’ve mentioned in many sessions a gratitude diary has been shown to help with this.  People who kept a gratitude journal reported feeling more optimistic and even slept better than those who didn’t.

Every night, take just five minutes to jot down three things you’re thankful for. They don’t have to be big, it might be as simple as “the smell of coffee this morning” or “the way the sun felt on my face.” The act of noticing and appreciating these moments trains our brain to focus on the positives, even when life feels challenging.

Another powerful happiness booster is kindness. Something I view as a win-win. Doing something for someone else, whether it’s helping a neighbour, surprising a friend with a thoughtful gift, or volunteering, creates what researchers call a “helper’s high.” Acts of kindness release feel-good chemicals like oxytocin and serotonin, giving a natural mood lift while strengthening social connections.

Relationships Matter

The longest-running study on happiness, the Harvard Study of Adult Development, shows that good relationships are the foundation of a happy life. The study, which has followed participants for over 80 years, found that those with strong, supportive connections were not only happier but also healthier and lived longer.

This doesn’t mean you need a huge social circle. It’s the quality, not the quantity, of relationships that matters. Think about the people who you can simply be yourself with. How often do you reach out to them?   A phone call to catch up, a message, or coffee with a friend can go a long way.

Finding Flow in Everyday Life

Have you ever been so engrossed in something that you lost track of time? This state of deep focus and enjoyment is called “flow,”. This happens when we are fully immersed in an activity that challenges you just enough to keep you engaged without overwhelming you.

Find activities that you genuinely enjoy and set aside time to do them regularly. It doesn’t matter if you’re a beginner or an expert, the joy is in the process, not the outcome.

Overcoming the Negativity Bias

Staying positive isn’t always easy, and it is not about a “toxic positivity” that ignores the challenges.  Our brains are wired with a negativity bias, a survival mechanism that makes us focus more on threats and challenges than on good experiences. While this helped our ancestors survive, it can sometimes make modern life feel more stressful than it needs to be.

One way to counteract this bias is to actively savour the good moments. For example, the next time you enjoy a cup of tea or watch a beautiful sunset, pause for a moment. Notice the details, the warmth of the mug in your hands, the colours in the sky, and let yourself fully experience the pleasure of that moment.

Another strategy is reframing. Instead of seeing setbacks as failures, try to view them as learning opportunities. Be kind to yourself. Acknowledge that mistakes happen and consider what would you do differently next time.

Taking Action

Happiness isn’t about achieving a perfect life; it’s about finding joy in the imperfect one you already have. By practicing gratitude, nurturing relationships, engaging in flow activities, and reframing challenges, you can create a life that feels richer and more fulfilling.

Take a moment to reflect on what brings you happiness and commit to one small action, whether it’s writing down what you’re grateful for, calling a loved one, or simply stepping outside to enjoy the fresh air.

Happiness is something we create, one choice at a time. And with each small step, you’ll find yourself moving closer to a life filled with positivity and purpose.